My husband has got a job!
He had an accident 9 years and damaged his leg. He was self employed at the time. I was on maternity leave on our first child. He had to get a few operations, and he couldn’t work, so that was the end of the business. His leg never really healed fully, and he has issues with arthritis and other things so he never went back to the kind of work he used to do (very manual, building type work).
Over the past nine years he has worked on various things generally part time, he’s studied and learnt new skills, and I worked different jobs and went to college, up until after the Boy was born six years ago. Everything he has done has been extremely flexible, so I have had him home and as a support pretty much since we’ve had children.
But it has been tough. There has been very little money. We are extremely lucky, because things always work out for us, we have a great family and friends and I am so grateful for all that we have, and all we have had. So even though it was a struggle at times, we decided that we would “make do” on less money, so that he could be around for me and the kids – because the work that he does is long hours, long weeks and most of the work that has been available in that industry over the last few years has been abroad. He had already missed out on his “first family” when they were small, he didn’t want to do it again.
I’m not sure where his decision to go back to work came from, maybe it was just that he was talking to someone who told him about some work coming up and said he’d give it a go. Maybe it was just that he was fed up of never being able to “just buy something” – every unplanned purchase has a consequence in such a low budget. Whatever it was, he made the call. He got the job. He started back to work. This is his first full week. The days are long for him – he is leaving the house in the morning at 4.30am, and he is getting home between 8.30pm and 9pm in the evenings – after the children are in bed. He literally won’t see them awake from a Sunday evening until Saturday morning, unless I keep them up after their bedtimes. And he has to go to bed close to 10pm, so he has time to eat and wash and have a ten minute conversation with me and then he’s gone to bed.
It is a big change for all of us. It is going to be tough – but hopefully we will make it work. We’re going to have to make it work. People always say that relationships are tested when people are out of work, because they have to spend a lot more time together, and the money problems put more pressure on them. We’ve lived like that for years now and I think it has brought us closer. I am worried that not getting to spend as much time together is going to be tough for us. But as I keep saying, we are going to make it work.