Depending On Others

This is something I am not very good at. Depending on others. I don’t know why, I suppose I have always been well able to take care of myself so I tend not to rely or depend on other people (except my husband).

I didn’t actually realise that until about five or six years ago when I started in counselling, and I started talking to my friends about things and one of my friends said it to me that I would never ask for help or depend on anyone else. I was surprised, but realised it was actually true. I’ve been through enough counselling to make a good guess at why that it is, but those musings are not for this post! 🙂

What has spurred this post is that this week I have had to ask people for help. My husband is gone long days, and I have an eye condition that means I can’t drive. I have the morning school run and two school pick ups to do each day and the school is a ten minute drive, that would take hours to walk! So I’ve had to ask for help. And I don’t like it. I am delighted that I have such lovely people in my life that they have no problem helping and each has offered to do more than I even asked them. I really appreciate it, and I get that warm fuzzy feeling about the fact I have such wonderful people around.

But it also makes me uncomfortable. I’m not sure why, I think it must be that I HAVE to depend on others. In case you’re thinking it might be because I might have to reciprocate in the future, it is not that. I am, and always have been, more than willing to help out with lifts and school runs. I am even happy to be asked. So therefore I should understand that these friends and family would be happy to help me too. But still I feel I am putting them out. This time however, I don’t have a choice, and I think this might be a great thing for me.

Do you find it easy to ask for favours and help, or do you find it hard like me? Do you know why you feel like that? It is an odd thing to think about.

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